


The trouble with toads (Or, Mukahi Gakuto can't catch a break)

by mochiboom



Series: Harry Potter AU [1]
Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling, Tennis no Oujisama | Prince of Tennis
Genre: Harry Potter AU, M/M, and inappropriately-timed roommates, muggle skincare products, toad shenanigans
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-01-06
Updated: 2014-01-06
Packaged: 2018-01-07 16:00:02
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,028
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1121790
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/mochiboom/pseuds/mochiboom
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Gakuto hates toads. He really, really hates toads. He also hates Ancient Runes and roommates who won't leave him and Yuushi the hell alone, but mostly he hates toads.</p>
            </blockquote>





	The trouble with toads (Or, Mukahi Gakuto can't catch a break)

**Author's Note:**

> This is for my darling [Jazz](http://lovelizlisa.tumblr.com/), who came up with the Tenipuri HP AU, and whose birthday is this week! Happy (early) Birthday ♥

“Fucks sake!” Shishido yelled at the crumpled piece of paper he held in his hands. Gakuto jumped a mile, smearing ink all over his perfect Potions essay. He glowered at Shishido.

 

“Oi, Ryou! What the hell’s your problem?” He snapped, banishing the smears with a flick of his wand.

 

Shishido rolled his eyes and tossed the now balled-up parchment into the merrily crackling green fire. He slouched moodily in the overstuffed armchair. “My mother. As usual.” Gakuto sighed, dipping his quill into the pot of excruciatingly expensive ink Yuushi had bought for him the other week.

 

“What’s the matter now, your sister managed to hex the dog, again?” He carefully wrote out the exact instructions for brewing Wolfsbane in neat, precise handwriting. He may hate Potions with a passion, but that didn’t mean he couldn’t bullshit a decent essay; hanging around with Yuushi had taught him all sorts of tricks.

 

“’He’ wants to visit.” Shishido muttered, glancing furtively around the empty common room. Gakuto stopped writing.

 

“Oh.” He replied, setting down his quill and turning to face his grumpy housemate. “Why’s that?” He asked, trying to sound nonchalant and probably failing.

 

Shishido shrugged, still glaring angrily into the fire. “Fuck knows. This isn’t the first time he’s wanted to come. I keep saying no, but he doesn’t seem to get it.” He got to his feet and paced agitatedly. “Why mother doesn’t put her damn foot down I’ll never-” He cut himself off suddenly as a group of first years stumbled through the door, scattering once they spotted Shishido glowering at them from the corner.

 

“Have you told him why he can’t?” Gakuto asked carefully, once the common room was empty once more. Shishido rounded on him, eyes blazing.

 

“What, d’you think I _like_ him hanging off my _fucking arm_ whenever I come home? ‘How was wizard school, Ryou?’ ‘When will it be _my_ turn to go, Ryou?’ ‘Will I get a wand magic stick like you, Ryou?” He tugged his cap off and ran a hand through his hair, yanking at it in frustration. “He just doesn’t fucking _get it_ , not matter how many times I tell him!”

 

“Calm down, Ryou, you don’t need to get so worked up about it. Just tell him you’re busy or something.” Gakuto picked up his quill again.

 

Shishido groaned in frustration. “You don’t _get it_!” He yelled. “ _None of you do_! You have _no idea_ what it’s like!”

 

“So you keep saying!” Gakuto snapped. “No we _don’t_ have any idea, but good _god_ could you stop playing the martyr for one fucking second?” He angrily gathered up his parchment and books. “I’m going to bed, go fucking talk to Ootori or the house elves or the damn wall for all I care!” He swept up the stairs.

 

* * *

 

“…and so I left him standing there, the gormless idiot.” Gakuto finished retelling his story, swiping Yuushi’s last bit of toast as the rest of the Ravenclaw table looked on nervously.

 

Yuushi sighed, taking another from the rack in front of him. “Please refrain from stealing my breakfast, Gakuto, you’re making the rest of my house nervous.” The unfortunate second year sitting next to Gakuto dropped his chopsticks with a clatter. Gakuto shrugged.

 

“S’not my fault the Ravenclaws are scaredy-cats. Or that Ryou’s a complete dick who just gets angry all the damn time.” He scowled, snatching a piece of egg roll off the dish in front of him. Yuushi glanced at his watch.

 

“The post should be here any minute, you should go back to your table or your poor mother’s owl will never be able to find you.” Gakuto wiped his fingers on Yuushi napkin and leaned over to give him a kiss.

 

“Ugh, fine. I’ll see you in,” he shuddered dramatically. “ _Ancient Runes_.” Yuushi nodded, pushing his glasses back up his nose and giving Gakuto’s ass a none-too-discreet slap. The same second year from earlier blanched and furiously studied the grains of rice in his bowl.

 

The rest of the day passed without much in the way of excitement. Gakuto handed in what he was sure was one of his best Potions essays to date _and_ was the only one who knew what you could use Demiguise fur for. He was positively bouncing by the time he got back to the Slytherin common room to find his mother’s snowy owl perched on top of one of the wardrobes in his dormitory.

 

It took five minutes of coaxing and half a packet of _Mistress Bulbo’s Marvellous Owl Treats_ before she deigned to come down. “Spoiled brat.” Gakuto muttered as he untied the parcel bound to her leg. She nipped his ear and took off, cuffing him around the head with one wing and flew out the window, quickly disappearing into the gently falling snow outside.

 

There was a letter and a small bottle labelled _Tea Tree and Witch-Hazel Toner_. Gakuto absently tossed the bottle onto his bed and sat down on the edge of it to read the letter. He was halfway through his mother’s explanation about the muggle skincare product she’d sent him when a deep croak right in front of him made his blood run cold. He slowly lowered the letter to find Ugly, his fucking toad, floating in the air and staring right at him with its disgusting, filmy eyes. Gakuto wasn’t very proud of his reaction; he screamed and fell off the bed in his haste to get away.

 

The door to the bathroom slammed open and Shishido, paralytic with laughter, stumbled out, clutching his stomach.

“You- your _face_!” He choked, bracing himself against the door frame.

 

Gakuto pulled himself to his feet. “Fuck you, you absolute _asshole_!” He screamed. “What’s _wrong_ with you?” Atobe stepped into the room, his perpetual shadow, Kabaji at his shoulder, took one look at the two of them and left again, slamming the door with a careless wave of his hand. _Damn him and his wandless magic!_

Gakuto smoothed his hair back into some semblance of control and cancelled the _Wingardium Leviosa_ on Ugly with a violent slash of his wand. “Not.” He hissed. “A _word_ of this to anyone.” He stalked out, Shishido’s laughter echoing in his ears.

 

* * *

 

A few hours later, Gakuto was dozing in the Ravenclaw common room, a drooling Jirou asleep on his shoulder when Yuushi came in. Gakuto lifted a hand and blinked sleepily at him. “Hey.” He called quietly. Yuushi sat on the arm of the chair and slid an arm around Gakuto’s shoulders, wincing only slightly as Gakuto leaned his bony chin on his thigh.

 

“What are you doing here?” He asked, running a hand through Gakuto’s hair. “Not that I’m complaining.” Gakuto pressed his cheek to Yuushi’s hand.

 

“Ugh, Ryou enchanted my fucking toad to float at my face. I’m actively avoiding the Slytherin common room until at least tomorrow.” Yuushi stifled a laugh and Gakuto frowned. “Hey, don’t laugh, you prick.”

 

“Sorry, sorry.” You have to admit it is a little bit funny, though.” He replied. Jirou startled awake, peering up at him and rubbing his eyes.

 

“Oh, Oshitari, you’re back. That’s good, I can go to bed now.” He stood up, stretching his arms above his head. “Atobe promised to take me to that famous chocolate shop in Butasake tomorrow, since it’s the weekend, but I’m not allowed to fall asleep at any point during the day or else I’ll have to pay!” His face took on a dreamy expression as he left, drawing the curtain that led to the stairs to the boys dormitory behind him. The common room was silent, save for the gently crackling fire and the soft ticking of the grandfather clock in the corner. Gakuto suddenly felt very tired.

 

“When is that idiot just going to ask Jirou out already. It pisses me off, seeing him dance around it like the wrath of fucking Voldemort’ll fall on his shoulders.” Gakuto muttered, only a little annoyed on his friend’s behalf. “Where were you, anyway?” He asked, budging up on the chair to let Yuushi slide in next to him. “Wizard Chess?”

 

“Kind of. Atobe challenged me to a one-on-one. Again.” Gakuto snorted, throwing his legs over Yuushi’s lap and leaning his head on his shoulder.

 

“What, he hasn’t learnt from last time?” Yuushi laughed.

 

“Apparently not. I can happily say he won’t be besting me in that any time soon. He wasn’t best pleased when my Queen smashed both his knights to pieces.” He stroked Gakuto’s thigh as he spoke, smiling as Gakuto snuggled closer.

 

“’Bet he didn’t like that, heh.” Gakuto all but slurred, eyes drooping shut in the warmth of the room. “Why is your common room so much warmer than ours. Jus’ because our house emblem’s a snake dun’ mean we like the cold.” He blinked. “No wait. Snakes don’t even _like_ the cold!” He exclaimed. “This school makes no sense.”

 

Yuushi chuckled. His hand in Gakuto’s hair felt very nice, he could definitely keep doing that for as long as he wanted, Gakuto decided. “So you keep saying, perhaps you should go and see the Headmaster and demand change.”

 

“Nah, then I wouldn’t have an excuse for coming here. You know I only hang around because your common room has a normal fire and nice armchairs.” Gakuto yawned. “’S’not that I actually like you or anythin’.”

 

“Heaven forbid.” Yuushi replied, tilting Gakuto’s chin up with the tips of his fingers.

 

“ _Must_ you do that in here?” Yuushi closed his eyes in despair, pulling away to smile pleasantly at fellow Ravenclaw Nomura Takuya, who had one hand over his eyes and was gingerly sidestepping across the room in the vague direction of the dorms.

 

“Ahh, Nomura, always a pleasure.” Yuushi replied. “I take it your date with Asura-chan went well?” Gakuto sniggered quietly. Nomura’s bad luck with girls was infamous. “You’re back early.”

 

Nomura slowly removed his hand from his face, cracking one eye open, then the other when he was sure it was safe. “Yes, well. She suddenly remembered she needed to firecall her brother.” He replied.

 

Yuushi nodded. “I’m sure.” Gakuto muttered under his breath.

 

“But she said she’d ‘love to meet up again’!” He announced, looking for all the world like he’d just gotten Os in all his NEWTS.

 

“Oh?” Yuushi tried to feign interest, but it was hard when Gakuto kept running his foot up and down Yuushi’s calf. “That is good news.” He grinned, hoping it looked at least a little genuine. Nomura was apparently too entranced to notice and Yuushi used the opportunity to remove Gakuto’s hand from his thigh, which had been slowly creeping towards his belt.

 

He stood up abruptly, pulling Gakuto with him. “We were just heading to bed, actually. I’ll see you later Nomura.” Yuushi blurted out, all but bolting for the dormitories, Gakuto giggling behind him.

 

“’Love to meet up again’?” Gakuto snorted, flinging himself onto Yuushi's bed and staring at the ceiling. “In his dreams, more like.” Yuushi pulled his tie off and hung it on the back of his desk chair.

 

“I don’t want to crush his dreams. He’ll be unbearable if he finally realises no girl is going to want to have anything to do with him.” He took off his glasses and rubbed his eyes. “Heaven knows he’s unbearable enough as it is.” He sat down on the bed, the ancient mattress protesting as it always did, and slid his hand up the back of Gakuto’s cardigan. Gakuto hummed quietly, wriggling contently on the bed.

 

“M’mmm, are you coming to ours again this Christmas? Or is you mother demanding you back to deepest Kansai?” Gakuto stretched out like a cat, glancing up at Yuushi from underneath his fringe.

 

“Oh I imagine she’ll insist, but as long as I’m back for New Years I hardly imagine she’ll make too much of a fuss if I’m elsewhere come Christmas.” Yuushi replied, leaning down to press a kiss to the back of Gakuto’s neck. “As long as I’m on my best behaviour the whole day.” He murmured, breath hot at Gakuto’s ear.

 

“That sounds suggestive,” Gakuto replied, turning over so Yuushi could pin him to the bed, sliding a hand into Yuushi’s hair. He gasped as Yuushi flicked open the top button of his shirt and pressed a kiss to the vulnerable curve of Gakuto’s throat.

 

“Wouldn’t you know.” Yuushi replied, brushing his lips at the corner of Gakuto’s mouth. Gakuto pouted and grabbed a handful of his hair.

 

“Will you stop fucking around a kiss me properly already?” He snapped. “Or do I have to be the only one who does anything in this relationship?” Yuushi grinned.

 

“Yes, yes your highness.” He shot back, and then his mouth was on Gakuto’s and his hand was sliding up Gakuto’s shirt and Gakuto was pretty sure he was going to melt into a puddle right there and then because _how the hell was Yuushi so good at this?_

He exhaled sharply into Yuushi’s mouth, fisted his other hand hard in the back of Yuushi’s shirt and tried not moan embarrassingly when Yuushi’s tongue flicked into his mouth. He failed, dismally.

 

He only whimpered a _tiny_ bit when Yuushi pulled away a little, their lips still close enough that they caught a little on every other ragged breath. Gakuto forced his eyes open with some difficulty to find Yuushi staring at him, cheeks flushed and pupils blown wide. Gakuto swallowed roughly, raising himself up on his elbows just a little to close the distance between them again.

 

“I’m giving you exactly _five seconds_ to get the _hell_ off each other before I hex you both.” Nomura yelled from the door. Yuushi sighed and Gakuto groaned in frustration.

 

“Alright, alright, keep your hair on.” Yuushi replied, moving off Gakuto and reaching over for his glasses, sliding them resignedly back on his nose. Gakuto crossed his arms and stared fixedly at the ceiling.

 

“ _Must_ you do it in public?” Nomura cried, stalking over to his own bed and pointing at the curtains tied to the bedposts. “If you’re going to… get _handsy_ in here, at least shut the damn drapes!”

 

Yuushi leered at him. “But then we wouldn’t be able to freak you out, would we?” Nomura’s jaw dropped.

 

“Y-you mean you.” His face went red. “You do it on _purpose_?!” He all but screamed, glasses lopsided on his face. Gakuto burst out laughing. “I’ll be telling the prefects about this!” He warned, retreating into the safety of his own bed and shutting the curtains with a violent jab of his wand. So violent in fact that he ripped them clean off the rails.

 

Gakuto shrieked with laughter, turning over to muffle it into Yuushi’s pillows. Nomura, face as red as a tomato, muttered an angry _reparo_ and the curtains leapt back into position. Yuushi stifled a laugh and closed his own curtains, plunging the room into silence.

 

* * *

 

The next morning saw Gakuto furiously trying to cover up a hugely conspicuous bite mark on the side of his neck. “For fuck’s sake, Yuushi, why are you so… so _bitey_?” He waved a hand at his neck. “I look like I’ve been savaged by some fucking werewolf. Yuushi, lounging on his bed with the sheets tangled around his hips, looked up from his Wizard’s Chess magazine and shrugged.

 

“You certainly weren’t complaining about it last night.” He replied dryly, turning the page. Gakuto scowled and returned to muttering concealment charms, hoping to god one of them would just make the damn mark disappear and not his entire neck.

 

In the end they were twenty minutes late for breakfast. As soon as they stepped into the Great Hall, Shishido impatiently waved at Gakuto, who shrugged apologetically at Yuushi, pecked him once on the cheek and ambled over to the Slytherin table. Yuushi sat down, as he always did, next to Jirou, who was in danger of falling asleep into his fruit salad. Yuushi shook him awake and poured himself a glass of apple juice.

 

“Look, Gakuto.” Shishido said as soon as he’d sat down. “About the toad thing, I’m really sorry. It was a really dickish thing to do.” Gakuto raised his eyebrows in surprise. “Even if it was fucking hilarious- **ow**!” He cut off mid sentence and glared at Choutarou sitting across from him, who smiled beatifically in return. “Um.” He turned back to Gakuto who snagged one of the last bowls of rice and a packet of natto. “What was I saying?”

 

“You were begging for my forgiveness.” Gakuto replied, squeezing the mustard over the beans and stirring them vigorously with his chopsticks. Across the room, Yuushi visibly shuddered.

 

“Oh. Right. Yeah, um, I’m sorry, alright. I know how much you hate that thing.” Shishido scratched the back of his head, looking sheepish.

 

“Oh, Ryou.” Gakuto patted him on the arm. “It was a fucking joke. I only went to Ravenclaw because I was annoyed and wanted a...” He glanced at Yuushi. “A distraction.” Shishido blanched and pushed his plate of eggs away.

 

“I.” He swallowed and ran a hand over his face. “ _Really_ did not need to hear that.” he look appalled and angrily swigged his glass of lemon water. Gakuto smiled, zen-like, and tipped his natto onto his rice.

 

Next to him, Shishido was mouthing something angrily across the table to Choutarou, who looked nonplussed, and further down the table, Atobe was suddenly ambushed by Jirou, who launched himself at Atobe and narrowly missed a face full of scalding hot tea. Even if he did have double Potions and Ancient Runes today, at the very least he could enjoy tormenting Shishido a little longer.

 

His neck twinged and he rubbed it irritably, forgetting until it was too late the muggle concealer he’d had to resort to in order to hide it the very obvious teeth marks. Shishido spat out his mouthful of juice and Choutarou went bright red, suddenly finding his plate of fried fish very interesting. Gakuto closed his eyes in helpless acceptance, swearing vengeance on Yuushi the Vampire.

 

_I swear to god you bastard, I’ll make you wish you’d never been born._

**Author's Note:**

> By the way, as a Japanese Language student I had to try and put my degree to good use seeing as this story is set in Japan. The name I came up with for the Japanese version of Hogsmeade is 豚酒 (butasake), which literally means Pig Alcohol (get it: Hogsmeade = Hog[s] Mead[e]?).
> 
> Oh, and Shishido's little brother is a squib. Make of his reaction what you will.


End file.
